Alley Oop 146: Kyrie Irving vs a Robot, Bulls Ruin the Cavs & Knicks Take the NBA Cup

We’re actually in the same building today, same area code, and I’m feeling plush. Screenshot us and get creative with what you’d put behind me, just keep it classy. Also, shout to the crew for launching our Substack—lock in with the kids.

Have you seen that TikTok lady who tries every wild kitchen trend and says, everybody’s so creative? Speaking of vibes, congrats to the Knicks, but context matters—Wemby didn’t look right as he mourned his grandmother, played fewer minutes, and wasn’t himself.

How you feel about the Knicks deciding not to hang an in‑season tournament banner in the Garden?

That’s the right call. We’re not putting novelty wins next to real championships, and a few teams should take notes.

Banner is extra, but mark it somehow. Put a small star by the logo with the year, or a trophy graphic on the floor for the rest of the season. Even a jersey patch works. And don’t act like it meant nothing—those guys split serious money, that’s life‑changing for young players.

Can we put respect on Tyler Kolek’s name? Teams were ready to move him for nothing, and the Marquette guard showed poise, rim pressure, and touch—like Brunson and other high‑IQ college guards who need a minute—then dropped meaningful points in the final.

He wanted it more. Speaking of Vegas vibes, Floyd sat courtside next to Jay‑Z and Blue Ivy and pulled out stacks like a magic trick, peeling bills for someone in the row. Did he have to bring out the whole brick to tip?

That’s how you get got if you don’t roll deep. The woman next to Blue Ivy stayed locked forward like she’d been warned a stunt was coming.

Maybe it was three hundred bucks with chocolate bars in the middle. That’s how I’d do it.

This one meant something—the Bulls finally got their get‑back on the Cavs after the crossover that sent them spiraling, and they hadn’t won since Thanksgiving. I knew they weren’t losing that rematch.

It felt like the upside down since that night. Even De’Andre Hunter hasn’t looked the same, and the big dunk clip folks posted wasn’t even memorable. Now they’re talking about bringing him off the bench.

Cleveland, make a move. You can’t be dropping games like that and acting like it’s fine. Something’s got to give with that core.

Injuries stack up, the rotation choices have been messy, and it’s back to the Donovan show. We’ve seen that movie—first‑round exit, trade request, and us shaking our heads.

Kyrie made headlines for beefing with a robot. He tapped it and sent it down like a bowling pin.

He acted like it would pop back up, then tried to triage it like arena tech. Lucky this isn’t the peak of his PR struggles, because that clip would’ve blown up his week.

I’ve never felt bad for a robot until that shuffle‑shuffle‑thud.

I’m more worried robots won’t forget. That’s going in the cloud forever. Boy stop.

Alley‑Oop time. First clip: a grandma strolling across the court during a live youth game.

She walked through a fast break like it was the grocery aisle. At least throw a hand up and apologize, but thanks for supporting the kids—just not mid‑possession.

Next one’s a debate. Is it okay to grab a friend’s food?

I respect boundaries. I didn’t touch Juju’s fruit tray, but I did snag his last fry once he was done. That felt fair.

If you’re my people, we can share, but don’t sip my straw and don’t double‑dip a spoon. Grab your own spoon and we’re good.

I do let my dog kiss my face. That’s probably the most Caucasian thing about me. Boy stop.

Last clip: our untrained weather reporter hits ice while filming. Cue the perfect drop—damn, it’s in the streets.

Falling is hilarious until you confirm they’re okay. Then you can laugh for real.

Before we go, Unrivaled season is here in January and I’m riding with Team Vinyl no matter what. I’m planting the flag, we’re getting that chip this year.

I’m Team Breeze. Get the baddies, take your partner, and get buckets while you’re at it.

Much love to everyone listening, and to Mr. Becca and Dylan. Same time next Tuesday, same channel. Go Vinyl.